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Friday, February 13, 2009

This Week [UPDATED]

This was our week:

train wreck

Things began their spiral into the Official FAR Manor Vortex of Suck™ Sunday morning, although (as usual with such things) it seemed like a minor incident at the time. I’d charged the battery on Little Zook Friday night and Saturday morning, and it fired up fairly quickly that afternoon. I ran my errands and parked the bike, figuring I was set for the ride to work Monday and Tuesday mornings. (Wednesday and Friday had rain in the forecast, and I work at home on Thursdays.) Since nobody else was ready for church Sunday morning, I jumped on the bike and hit the starter… and got the zzzzzzz noise that indicates a weak battery. As I’d been using it only a day ago, that’s a pretty obvious clue that the battery needs replacement.

After church, the Evil Twins’ family came to visit and to help cut up a tree that had gone down by the pond. I had completely forgotten about them coming, and they were making noises about having to leave in a few hours, so Mrs. Fetched offered to pick up the battery for me while I was whacking at the tree.

The Vortex began accelerating: a vine growing up the side of the tree turned out to be poison oak; I figured it was February so it would be mostly dormant, and (after cutting into some of it with the chainsaw) I peeled it off and threw it in the brush pile. Meanwhile, Mrs. Fetched had neglected to get her purse out of the truck… and used that as an excuse to not get the battery. (Had this been important to her, she would have found a way to retrieve her purse.) We cut wood until the chain got dull, loaded up all but the biggest pieces, and got it up to the house. The Twins decided that the event they were attending was not that important, so they ended up staying through supper.

Monday dawned; I headed to work. Mrs. Fetched said she was going to get the battery before the chicken catchers showed up late in the evening, but when I came home… of course, it hadn’t happened. Her excuse: she spilled her purse in the truck, and the check she was going to cash slid under the seat and she didn’t find it until much later. That’s so lame it’s probably true… but her dad had earlier offered to loan us the money to get the battery. Once again, if it was important to her, she would have gotten it done. The chicken catchers came for the birds that night; I just got well-acquainted with Mr. Bacardi.

Tuesday afternoon, I noticed the first poison oak blisters on my arms, which did nothing to improve my outlook. Even more annoying was the phone ringing every few minutes that evening, just after I started thinking about going to bed. Everything finally settled down, and we went to bed…

…and the phone rang at 3 a.m. Mrs. Fetched grabbed it on the first ring, before she was even awake, and answered, "mm haaaooo?" To make a long story not quite so long, Snippet had another one of her psychotic episodes, ostensibly because The Boy was in another room with a friend for a drink and light conversation. After she whacked him across the head with a Guitar Hero controller, he tried to wrap her up until she calmed down. Didn’t work, and after she started drawing blood… he hit back. The upshot is, Snippet plays the innocent little girl card extremely well (the only people who like her don’t know her), and The Boy was the one who got busted. It took pretty much all day Wednesday to get him bailed out… which we did because we know Snippet and how she operates, and The Boy only did what most of us want to do without nearly as much provocation. But here’s the upside: They’re enjoined from having any contact with each other until their court date in May. We’re hoping he’ll lose interest in her before then and get on with his life.

There’s one little complication, though… yeah. That Complication. The Boy wants to do the right thing, but Snippet (and her mom) are making it just as difficult as possible… threatening to take the kid and disappear. Nice people, huh? I give it a pretty fair chance that it’s not The Boy’s kid, and the doctors gave as high as 50/50 odds of a miscarriage.

Next to that, the poison oak from my hands to elbows is a minor annoyance. I’ve got an appointment with the doctor on Monday if it doesn’t start drying up.

Thursday evening, we got a broadcast email at work: “Blah blah, great quarter, blah blah, anticipating problems, blah blah, we’re canceling merit increases this year.” The sub-text: the economy’s crappy, what’cha gonna do about it? Suckaaazzz…

And now: the high point of the week. I saw a bumper sticker that said, “When life gives you lemons, get a bottle of tequila.” Excellent advice. I suppose it was too quiet around here lately anyway.


  1. {{FARfetched}} I'm so sorry. I've been thinking of you and your family.

  2. Gee Far, what's happened? Hope everything is ok...

  3. Dear god .. what happened? And are you and your family OK?

    Fingers crossed.

  4. Oh no FAR. Sending good vibes your way.

  5. I hope that everything is okay, Far.

  6. Thanks guys. All will be revealed tomorrow. Everybody's OK so far… and things could be a lot better if the right things happen, but still this week has sucked.

  7. Fretting, KB? I don't know. I'm hoping that this is the bottom, and things will start improving from here. If we're lucky, The Boy will figure out that Snippet is not worth the effort. He's twice told Mrs. Fetched, "All I wanted was for someone to love me for me." Snippet, apparently egged on by her mom, is making things just as difficult as possible… and he might have been her best chance to have a halfway-decent life.

  8. {{ Oh, FAR }} I'm so sorry...

    Our boy was involved for years (10 years) with a violent girl. Over the years she went from throwing glasses at him (hard enough to break) to stabbing him with broken bottles and screw drivers.

    Luckily he never married her and now he and the kids are safely more than a 1000 miles away. We miss him but, it's worth it knowing that they're finally safe.

    It's harrowing to go through that. I'm so sorry.

  9. Wow, KB. I ought to have my Boy talk to your Boy. I don't think anything *we* say is going to do any good.

  10. Hey FAR ... yeah, that sounds like a real humdinger. {{hugs}} Sorry you're dealing w/ it all ... and I hope your poison oak clears asap ... that is nasty stuff.

  11. Oh, man. When I hear parents with young kids talk about hoping their kids "grow up" soon so that they can get a break, I just want to laugh. As a parent with both very young and adult children, all I can say is, my "little" ones are so much easier than the "big" ones ;).

    What a mess! I hope Boy figures it out.

  12. FAR, we always told him not to try to defend anyone (himself or kids) If she went bat-sh*t-crazy either leave or drop to the floor. And that seemed to work. It sometimes disarmed her and she'd go into a verbal/mocking mode instead of physical. Then he could gather the kids and come here.

  13. Jeez, Farf, and I thought I had a bad week! Hope the coming one is a LOT better, and the loose ends tie themselves up. Good luck with the poison oak, too - when it rains...... Sending positive vibes!

  14. Hey all!

    Olivia, I pretty much have to deal with it. I doubt it will go away on its own.

    Wendy, the "big" one isn't that much of a problem. If he could gather the determination to scrape off the girlfriend, he'd probably be OK. As long as he didn't hook up with another one like her. :-P

    KB, that's a great idea! I'll pass that on to him.

    Beth, this week is shaping up to be a bit better. Let's hope it stays that way. I'd trade places with you any time. :-D

  15. Oy, you have my sympathies FarF, not a good week.

  16. Hey Far, if The Boy moves back in, you can get him to push start you on the motorcycle...

    Problem solved.

  17. Hey there FAR,
    Man, when the vortex of suck hits, it really smacks you hard, eh? From dead batteries to poison oak to TB and his travails, I'd want to run away and hide! That Snippet sounds seriously deranged and I hope TB will wise up now and extend being "enjoined" even longer, permanently in fact! I know he's fundamentally a good guy, and he (and your family) deserve so much better (and calmer)!

    How's Daughter Dearest doing? Must be fine since she escaped the suckitude. Give her my best for me when you see her.

    Hanna sends lots of wags and puppy kisses!

  18. Hey Far, just look upon it as training for the "FarFuture", you'll be all toughened-up by the time it hits in 2012...

    Btw, I think everyone's farfuture is happening now, we wouldn't have to wait until 2012...

  19. Kelly, you have no idea. At least I hope you don't.

    Yooper, I’m going to get the right battery tomorrow. One good thing about working at home once a week, you get to run errands at lunch!

    IVG… thanks much. Lots I'd like to say, but maybe in email, where I can make sure it's not taken the wrong way. ;-) Give Hanna an ear scritch for me!

    Solar, you got it. Can I come hide at your place for a while?

    Yooper, it's not quite happening yet. When the rolling blackouts start…


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